A few years back, my friend convinced me to watch Sex and the City. Despite having never seen an episode of the original series, he insisted that even if I didn’t catch on to the plot of the film, there’d be other aspects I’d enjoy.

Enter Carrie Bradshaw’s wedding dresses.

The first (and one she ultimately gets married in), is a simple, non-designer skirt and blazer set. Her friends find it nearly impossible that fashion-savvy Bradshaw would want to be anywhere near a piece like that. So after some convincing, she almost walks down the aisle in an enormous strapless gown with an ivory corset top and a trailing, cloud-like skirt. I dreamt of that dress, and figured part of the inspiration must come from Sarah Jessica Parker herself.

Imagine my surprise upon finding out that at her wedding to Matthew Broderick (a year before the original show’s air date), SJP arrived at the ceremony in a pitch black off-the-rack gown. For her, it was a matter of not drawing unnecessary attention by being seen shopping for something extravagant, especially since the wedding was a surprise for everyone except the happy couple. But lots of other people, including celebrities known for their style, opt for “non-traditional,” non-white wedding attire.

Historically, the color white has been used as a symbol of innocence, virginity, and overall goodness and light. This wasn’t always the case, though. Back in the 1700s, wearing true white was almost offensive, as the color was used to represent grief, specifically worn during funerals. This all changed with Queen Victoria. She got married in white, because of its implications of purity and to communicate that her marriage was out of love and not obligation, as well to highlight the lace makers’ artistry. This set forth a movement in which brides, first of wealthy status and then of every class level, actively sought out white dresses.

Now, a similar phenomenon is occurring. Instead of icons like the queen, wedding attire is being influenced by celebrities, including Elizabeth Taylor (who had eight wedding dresses, five of which were not white), Dita von Teese (whose purple taffeta gown was so extravagant it’s now on display at the Victoria and Albert Museum), and of course, the aforementioned Sarah Jessica Parker.

Knowing that white wedding dresses weren’t popularized until 1840, and that the meaning behind them often comes from a sexist reinforcement of the loss of ‘girlhood values,’ it might seem better to stray away from the color altogether. As of 2019, 18% of couples reported choosing colorful outfits to tie the knot, and that number seems to be on the rise, with media representation being a huge factor.

Just like there’s a million ways to fall in love, there’s also a million ways to look on your wedding day. Whether it be a tuxedo, a jumpsuit, a showy veil, bedazzled jeans, or a non-traditional dress color, one’s wedding attire should only meet one requirement: making the wearer feel absolutely incredible.

Here Comes the Bride in Black