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How to Age Gracefully

Photography by Madison Goldberg

On the evening following my 21st birthday, I noticed fine lines forming under my eyes and my forehead. My heart dropped to my stomach as I faced an inevitable fear: aging. I immediately Googled “anti-aging products,” added hundreds of dollars worth of skincare into my Sephora cart, then came to several realizations. First of all, I had barely entered my twenties, and yet I was already picturing myself in a nursing home. Second of all, what’s wrong with wrinkles, and why, as a woman, did I become fearful of them? 

There is a double standard when it comes to aging between men and women. For women, wrinkles and grey hair are taboo. Gaining weight is seen as “letting yourself go.” Meanwhile, men are described to have “salt and pepper” hair, and wrinkles are signs of maturity. Women are expected to appear young forever, while men are applauded for maturing. Why do we insist that women find the fountain of youth, while men are free to “age like fine wine?” The stigmatization of aging for women can have negative effects on their wellbeing and their wallets.

According to Statista, the global anti-aging market was estimated to be worth $50.2 billion in 2018 and is expected to reach a value of $79.5 billion by 2024. This includes cosmetic procedures like Botox, but a large part of this is anti-aging products; moisturizers, serums, and eye creams are marketed to reduce signs of aging. Women are targeted by large beauty corporations with buzzwords like “instant age-rewind,” “age-defying,” “youth elixir,” etc. The “anti-aging” section of Sephora alone has 248 products, with prices ranging from $7.50 to $350. 

According to a study conducted by Amy Muise, a psychology professor at York University in Canada, women in their 50s are more likely to purchase anti-aging products, but the effort to prevent signs of aging begin as young as 20 years old. In this study, many women found that looking good strongly correlated with looking younger. The study also found that though most women were skeptical of these products’ effectiveness, they use them nonetheless because they give women a sense of control over their appearance and allow them to embrace aging naturally. 

Journalism major Annika Hom ‘20 feels the pressure of maintaining a youthful appearance as she enters her 20s. She says that her mother advises her to use a lot of moisturizer and sunscreen in order to keep her skin youthful. “I find myself thinking I’m really lucky to be 20 because this is probably the best that I’ll look, and I try to imagine what I’ll look like when I’m older. I feel like guys don’t usually think about that,” Hom says. 

Many factors are linked to women’s apparent need to stay youthful: the rise of social media and its seemingly perfect realities, Hollywood’s portrayal of older women (or lack thereof), and highly retouched magazine covers. Female celebrities are praised for appearing the same way they did when they were younger: Jennifer Aniston, Angelina Jolie, and Cindy Crawford, to name a few. These types of celebrities are usually the ones who remain relevant in Hollywood. Female celebrities who show signs of aging are either ridiculed for it, attempt to hide it through Botox or Photoshop, or lose their jobs because they are no longer deemed attractive. Katie Beaven, a professor of Gender in a Global Perspective, says the globalized standard of beauty gets younger and younger as time passes. “‘Woman’ is constructed with this idea of ideal femininity, and that ideal femininity is impossible to obtain, but we’re kind of conditioned into trying to achieve it. I think [ideal femininity] wants us to look eternally young, beautiful, have flawless complexions, no wrinkles, and a perfect body,” Beaven said. Meanwhile, male celebrities like Steve Carrell, George Clooney, and Leonardo DiCaprio are all celebrated for being “silver foxes,” having “dad bods,” and overall just aging well. 

The irony is that stress over aging can lead to even more premature aging. Why fear the inevitable? Being youthful should not strongly correlate with beauty. Though many women use anti-aging products and procedures to feel good about themselves, we must recognize the difference between self-love and feeling pressured by society to use such products. Age should no longer be a secret. Women can be silver foxes, too.